Globetrotter Confessions Chapter 1: Adventures at Long Beach International Airport

Published by Streetz in Travel on May 1st, 2008 | 30 Comments »

Whats good?

As I got home from the gym tonight, I was reminiscing on my trip to Cali last month(First Time there too!). It was one of the best trips I’ve ever taken. The A-TEAM(Facebook group), went to compete in the Long Beach Step show, and I finally got to see all my Cali peoples whom I’ve known for years but I NEVER visited their coast! Travelling with my bros, you ALREADY know that crazy stories will accompany those road trips. This one is no different:

So I was supposed to be on a plane out of Long Beach Airport on Sunday Night. Needless to say, fuckin around with these Alphas, I conveniently missed my flight, and was rockin on the first plane out Monday Morning, lol… Our night running around SoCal, visiting our peoples, and actin an ASS was definitely worth staying the last night. From doing introductions at one party, crashing about 3-4 bbqs/pool parties, and KILLIN the 405 expressway, its safe to say LA LOVES NY ALPHAS! Along the way, there was HEAVY drinking involved, and this made for one of the CRAZIEST Airport experiences of my LIFE!!

So, I’m rollin with 2 of my Bros, Rich and Ed(for anyone reading this who knows these 2… you already know where this story is going, lmao!) and we hit Long Beach Airport(LGB). This airport is the size of my house, and save the beautiful surrounding area, its a glorified helipad. We roll in the airport after being dropped off, and we are doing nuthin but crackin jokes, talkin shit about the weekend, and wildn OUT! We get our boarding passes and go to the check in area. I always get nervous here as I’m constantly waiting to be that dude that gets “Selected for random searches”. lol. Anyhoo, we roll to the metal detectors and get ready to be processed, when Rich says ‘Oh shit”. In my drunken giddiness I yell “Fuck u MEAN oh shit? Whats wrong?” He goes “I don’t have my NY ID.. I think I lost it in the club” Now, for ANYONE who has to deal with the TSA, you knew drunken black dudes at an airport with no ID = PROBLEMS! hahahaha! So we all look at each other… and I say to him, quoting a line from one of my FAVORITE movies “You’re on your own JOJO!!” and walk to the OTHER metal detector check-in area, hahaha. So he gets thru the detectors and has to be searched automatically for no ID.. Ed and I are laughing HYSTERICALLY! Tellin TSA to make sure he don’t got nuthin, how “His people” are known to act up on flights…LOL! Jokes for days.. Little did I know I that this was only the beginning!

So ya boy is up next! I empty my pockets, take off the shoes, the whole 9, and the metal detector goes off… I’m lookin at the TSA dude like “You think its my earring?” LMAO! Dude definitely was like “:-…just empty everything out your pockets.. something may be setting it offf…” So my inebriated self says “Fuk THAT I’m throwin ALL this shyt OUT!” So I empty my pockets, had a bunch of papers and whatnot in random pockets, and threw em all out in the trashcan in front of the metal detector. So I go thru again and BAM! I’m good $$$$. So TSA dude goes “wheres your boarding pass?”

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MY DRUNK ASS THREW THE FUCKIN BOARDING PASS OUT!!!!!!!

So I look @ TSA dude and the convo goes like this:

Me: “I threw it out”
TSA:“You serious”
Me: “Yessurrrrrrrrr (goofy smile shruggin shoulders) Lemme just go back and get it…”

***5 TSA people rush in****

Me: (Holding hands in the air) “Or not…….” LMAO

TSA dude: “I’ll get it for you..don’t worry”(laughing)

Needless to say my pass was in the garbage can.. I proceeded to pick up my face, reattach it, and go upon my tipsy ass way….

Finally we get to Ed. This man was pretty quiet the whole time, with laughter here n there, like he wasn’t about to become a victim… He gets thru the check-in good, but his bag got flagged for a search. They go through his bag and find a vat of cocoa butter. They tell him that he has to ditch it because of the whole 4 oz carry-on rule. It looked like he lost his Best Friend, lmaooo

He was damn near beggin like Keith Sweat for his CB – “Come on fam… it was $8(who pays $8 for Cocoa Butter, specially in the hood?! lmao)”yall gotta let me thru… i aint gonna do nuthin with it.. i didn’t even get to use it like that!!”

So I’m lookin at him and make the most profound/foolish drunk statement of 08:

“Plane ticket to Cali – $300.
Cocoa Butter – $8
Being drunk in front of TSA – Priceless”

I think TSA banished us to our seats while tears was in their eyes from laughter.. Definitely stories for days…

We finally get to our gate and sit down, rollin and laughin about our experience and weekend. This is my every week, dealing with the fools that I call brothers.

Mind you this was all in a span of 10 minutes during our time LEAVING Cali… So you can only imagine our everyday, hahahhaaha!!

Hopefully I’ve helped you escape from doing work or any other egregious task that dares to make you productive in any area of life. Consider this your daily escape!

Until Next time…

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